Tuesday 29/03/2011

Firstly, i would like to say a big 'well done' to  our 2 boys for brilliant parents evening reports, very good considering the way they are sometimes.

Anyway, today i was supposed to get my results back, and finally find out what i have and what type it is. But due to my bi-opsy and bone marrow results not being back yet, i now have to wait another week ! FFS.
But from the way the specialist was talking i know shes hiding something, and here are my reasons :

1. She used the word cancer a lot today, she didn't on our first visit..

2. She said the treatment would be outpatient at Huddersfield, now its a sleep over at Leeds..

3. I go back to see her next Tuesday, she said she can book me in for treatment next Friday..

I asked about the CT scan i had, all she told me was there are a lot more lumps (like the 1 i had in my neck) in my abdomen, groin and chest, which fills me full of joy (not !)
So I'm back to waiting, again. And all I've got to look forward to is getting my stitches out on Friday morning.
We have both sat the boys down and tried to explain to them what is going to happen as good as we can, but not really knowing what I'm up against, was a bit tricky.

I would like to thank all of you from Twitter, for your support and help its very much appreciated. I really do follow some amazing people, your all truly wonderful.

Anyway that's it..... that's all i know, when i find out more i will tell you.

Thanks for reading

Offski

Saturday 26/03/2011

Yesterday was the day i went to hospital for my bi-opsy. Firstly i had to travel to Halifax, which is about 10 miles away. I get there for 7.15, to find out that I'm due in theatre at 8.30 am. This was good news due to the fact i don't like hospitals, so i sit and wait, and wait and wait. By 10.30 I've spoken several swear words in Shelley's direction and wound myself up nice and tight. I went to find a nurse and ask whats going on (not very politely), she wanders off and comes back to tell me that they have put 2 others in front of me !
Midday comes, and by now I'm in a foul mood. Then i get called, and off i go. Get on the table shaking uncontrollably, the sleep dude is asking me what i do, and the next thing is its 13.15 and I'm waking up, being wheeled to the ward.
After 30 mins i come round properly, and chat to the other to lads that are in the ward. I go to the loo, look in the mirror to see a 5 inch slit in the side of my neck held together with staples and some sort of bar. I was never the best looking guy, but FFS it makes me look like a Texas chainsaw massacre reject. Also i have a hole on my right hip, where the bone marrow was taken from.
At 14.15 Shell and the Whirlwind come to visit along with her sister-in-law and her mate. We chat and get told that im allowed home at 18.00, so the girls go and i try and get comfy.
Its home time, im dressed and waiting and stagger out of the hospital, get in a car and go home.
We order takeaway, and i try and catch up on Twitter but give it up as a loss and head to bed at 9pm with the pills working i get in to bed. The only problem is, i have this thing on the left hand side of my neck, and the hole on my hip is on the right side, so trying to get comfy is a friggin nightmare. Ive managed to get some sleep, but now cant get settled anywhere i sit !
Its been a strange Friday and now i have to just wait till Tuesday for the specialist and my results, and to find out what treatment i will need.
Thanks for reading
Offski

Sunday 20/03/2011

After having a strange week last week, its set to be another this week. I have my CT scan on Wednesday, then have to travel to Halifax on Friday to have my bi-ops and bone marrow taken. I then have to go back to the specialist next Tuesday to get the results and to see what treatment they are going to give me. In a way im glad its going so quickly so i know what it is i have to fight, but on the other hand i know its going to put a strain on everything at home, especially when i have treatment. I know were both strong enough to deal with it, but its stress we could do without.
In other news, iTunes finally wanted to play nice yesterday and got round to cleaning all the crap off my phone, and it feels lighter now to.
I seem to have lost my Twitter mojo at the moment what with all this going on, im sure it will come back with a vengence soon, i bloody hope it does anyway. While im on about Twitter, i have had another clear out of my following. I cant understand why people follow, then dont want to talk.
The Whirlwind is coming on leaps and bounds now too. She is saying more words, starting to play fight and is very cheeky. But the biggest thing is she sleeps in a big bed now, and all night, which is a big load off. I have also decided that when she grows up shes either gonna be a Stuntwoman, a Dancer or a Comedian.
Anyway enough of wasting your time, thanks for reading
Offski.

Tuesday 15/03/2011

Just an update for you all :
So been to see the Ear, Nose and Throat dude today, there was 2 of them, 1 being a doctor in training. I sat down and we chatted, then he had a feel around my neck and throat paying attention to the 2 huge lumps then finding 2 more at the base of my neck/shoulder (well he didnt find them, i knew they were there and they hurt like f#ck), he asked if they hurt while pressing it. I take the, me jumping off my chair was the answer he needed ! He then looked down my throat, and stuck a camera up my nose and down the back, it felt wierd and now all i can taste is the jelly they put on the end of it.
I then had to sit and listen to the 2 of them discuss what they had found, has per the norm it was all doctor jargon. But while they were talking, i was having a look at the notes on his desk. The only word my eyes fixed on was c....., makes it feel more real when you see THAT word.
They finished talking and decided that they need to cut a bit out of my neck ASAP, and was given a letter to take straight away to a department.
So we found the place, gave them the letter and was booked in there and then for a Pre Op Assesment for tomorrow at 10am.
The specialist says i will be in for my Op within 2 weeks, but the speed its going, i reakon i will be in early next week. Lets just wait and see.
Had a crap bus ride home, to find another appointment to go back and see the blood woman 2 weeks today and should know then what type i have and what the treatment will be..
Thanks for reading
Offski

Saturday 12/03/2011

First i would like to say how sorry i am to see whats happening in Japan. No-one should have to go through anything like that. The TV pictures of that wave coming in, and the whirlpool in the ocean, scared the shit out of me ! But has with all disasters there are the morons with the jokes, don't get me wrong, i love a joke, but not when its disrespectful and sick. So you wont be seeing any from me on Twitter.

Just so you know Ive had a couple of my appointments come through to find out whats, what, and they start this Tuesday. I seem to be having a couple of down days due to the fact that all this is sinking in, but today i feel full of the joys of spring, so I'm making the most of it.
Also in other news, I've managed to get a new X-box 360 ! The middle brats x-box has got RROD (red ring of death) and is therefor knackered. So its been decided that he will have mine, and i get the new one, with 2 new games ! (i know, small things etc), but i don't care.
The Whirlwind seems to have grown up a lot this week too. She had her first night in a 'big' bed on Monday, and took to it straight away, also she is saying a lot more words and her cheeky side is starting to come out. She gives these cuddles that fills my heart full of joy and has me in fits of laughter with the things she does, shes ace.
Anyway it was only supposed to be a quickie,
Thanks for reading
Offski

Tubby the Tuba 3

So Normid 2000 was formed from all the older members of the youth band, and to be honest we had big expectations, how wrong we were. We got new members and got the band up to strength and went to Blackpool in the 4th section. We were drawn first, played then found a pub and got wrecked, this was to become a common activity. Out of 22 bands we come 19th ! what a shock and a hard kick in the balls that was, the journey home was a very quiet one.
We did concerts and carried on contesting but we never really won anything, which was very disapointing, and most contests were just a turn up and play, then go find a pub to get pissed in, this carried on for 3 years until a local 2nd section band came knocking.
They were the United Co-op band, and were a big deal in crewe. I went along to my first practice, sat and played my first piece and it was like WFT ! Everything was different, they sounded awesome and were very professional. I was offered a place so i took it.
We did a lot of high profile concerts and a lot contests (test piece and entertainment). The band was loved doing entertainment contests cos it wasnt so serious and we could show off. A lot of these style contests were held around the evesham, pershore and cheltnaham area, due to the fact that the conductor was from down there.
We went to Blackpool to complete in the 2nd section, the first year i went with them we came 4th, but the 2nd year we came 2nd and qualifed for London again but this year it was being held at the Wembley confrence centre. We went down again for a long weekend with the test piece called 'Firestorm' which was wrote about the gulf war, we came 6th and had a really good weekend. I even managed to get tickets to go see the Championship section at the Allbert hall. These were the best bands in the country, Black Dyke, Fodens,Cory and the Grimethorpe colliery band.
The film Brassed off was based on Grimethorpe (or Grimley) has they were in the film. If you have watched the film and you remember the bit at the end where Danny stands up and gives the big speach ? I was there, and it was a man called Major Peter Parkes, there conductor at the the time and very well to do. Every word that Danny said came from Major Parkes mouth, it put everyone in a state of shock, inculding the Queen. But he was right in what he said, and they deserved to win.
We got asked to go to Holland to do an entertainment contest over there, we jumped at the chance, it was for a week. I dont remember much about it apart from, staying awake on the coach all the way there, having a day out in Amsterdam, pissing about around the red light district, and winning. The reason i dont remember much is because of the large amount of Oranjeboom i drunk on the trip.
I got to 25 and started to lose interest, so i left and got on with my life. I still listen to Brass band music and keep an eye on results, and to be honest i would love to go back to it.... lets just wait and see.
Thanks for reading
Offski

Wednesday 09/03/2011

Hello ! for some reason i always want to start my blog with 'so' but I'm not going to.

Ive had an unusual weekend, what with the doctor on Friday, then getting my appointment on Saturday. Well yesterday was the specialist appointment and it confirmed what i already thought. I have been diagnosed with Leukemia, which sort we do not know yet. I am waiting to go in to hospital to have a bit of the lump cut from my neck, and have a bone marrow graft to find out whats, what. Then because most of the lymph glands that she could feel were enlarged, if need a CAT scan to see whats happening elsewhere. This should all be done in the next 2 weeks, then they can decided which way to go on the treatment.
I went to the docs over 2 years ago which lumps in my throat, but after a course of meds they went down. Then something has set it of again, but it means it a 'crawler' has the specialist said, so when they nail it its quite possible i wont have to go back again for a couple of years, or thats the plan anyway.
I know what to expect due to my first girlfriend's dad having the same thing, so i know i will have down days.
Now the next bit is probably gonna sound a bit far out but....
I dont know if i beleive there is anyone watching over us, but when the Whirlwind was born, and we found out that she had MCADD, i said i couple of.. well prayers i suppose. In them i asked if someone could make things ok for her, and if needed to, take bits of me to make it happen, and now im sat here typing about this.
Make of this what you will, but ive always belived in karma.
Im not looking for sympthy, what will be will be. But im going to blog about what happens and what i go through, so if you want to follow your more than welcome.

Thank you for the kind comments so far on Twitter, it means alot, and some of you might regret saying 'im here to talk to, if you need it' hahahaha.
Anyway thanks for reading, sorry its a bit morbid. Will let you know how i go on !

Offski

Tubby the Tuba 2

So anyway, where were we ?
Oh yes, i had just joined the youth band called South Cheshire Young Brass Band. We practised every Tuesday night 7-9 pm, and i was loving it ! everyone there had the same things in common has me, and half of the band was made up of the school band so we had a lot of fun.
The 2 main contests of the year were Blackpool Winter Gardens (the area's), and Pontins the semi's were held in southport around april and final's were at prestatyn. The first Pontins we did, we had a coach for and went on the day, after that a few of us decided to go and stay the whole weekend (thurs-mon). Now bear in mind we were a Youth band so the max age was 18, by the first time we stayed over i was 15 and had grown into my bones (6ft), the first thing we did when we got there was straight to the supermarket for trays of beer. We could all get into the night club at 15 and had the idea of buying the first one, then taking it in turns to go back to the chalet, load up with cans and go back in ! this was a tradition for the next 3 years and saved us a fortune. Also at the end of night they would kick us out the back door and the Pontins Grand Prix would start, first, jump over 4 rose hedges then 1 lap around the boating lake after you had pushed the boat in to the water ,then finish with a sprint to the dorm, doing this when ratarsed on Newcastle Brown Ale is not easy.
We also entered the area's at blackpool at the begining of March, we had a couple of years coming 2nd to Bessies boys, but in 1987 that all changed.
The Test piece was perfect for us, it was loud in parts and some good solo's for certain people it was called the Cumbrian Suite. The coach picked us up at 6am on the sunday morning from the band room, and we were off. We got to blackpool had a practice in some dive of a club then went to the Winter Gardens. We played an absolute blinder and waited for the other bands to play thiers, we were all nervous has the judges walked to the stage, they read out 3rd place then 2nd went to bessie's boys, then in slow motion he said our name, we had done it, we were off to the Royal Albert Hall in London.
The next 6 months was fund raising so we could afford to get down there, we were invited to the mayor of crewe's chambers, and even somehow managed British Rail into giving us our own coach of the 8.36 to London the Friday before the final's. We later found out one of the big bosses of British Rail (crewe being a big rail town and his home base), was an uncle of 1 of the players, and that was why it was free.

We all piled down to London on the Friday morning, booked into this swanky hotel, practiced, then we were set free to explore this huge city. Saturday was the final, we made our way to the Albert Hall quietly shitting ourselves, this was it, all the best youth bands in the country. We were drawn number 5, band 4 were playing when our name was called, we made our way to the stage but the only way on, was through this piddley arsed door about 4 1/2 ft high carved into the stairs that went up the back of the stage. Now my Tuba was 4ft high and very heavy but i managed to get through, we sat, we played and we come 6th, Not to bad out of 16 i suppose. On the Sunday we returned to Crewe like heroes, it was a big thing for our small town then, and we had these plaques given to us by the mayor. We went on to win the finals of Pontins for the next 2 years, and back to being 2nd at blackpool, but i was now 18 and time to move on. So South Cheshire turned into Normid 2000 brass has a 4th section band, and the adventures begun again whith the same group of people, only this time it was serious and grown up.

thanks for reading, last bit next time.

Offski

Friday 04/03/2011

So I've been to the doctors this morning, and i sat waiting, and these 2 old boys are talking. Now 1 cant hear properly and the other has a speech problem, they are talking about football from what i can understand, and after 5 minutes the whole surgery had cottoned on to the fact that Micheal Carrick had signed a new deal, apart from the deaf dude who just kept saying 'yer what'.
Anyway my name is called and off i go, i sit and to be honest im quietly shitting myself.
The doctor started off saying the blood specialist from huddersfield hospital, had rung him on wednesday night asking about me and how long i had had these lumps in my throat. He then showed me a graph and explained that the average white blood cell count (the ones that fight viruses) is apparently between 9.00-11.00 per something or other, and mine was 35.40 and this is highly iregular. So my bloods have now been sent to Leeds for deeper investigation, and the waiting begins.
I have also been fast tracked to go see some blood dude, and should have an appointment in the next 14 days. While talking he said a few things that scared the shit out of me, like it could be Weil's disease (Rats carry this), or he had seen a 4 year old last year with a lump in her neck like mine and she had Tuberculosis !
Its my lymph glands that are the size of golf balls but he still cant say why the high white blood cell until ive seen this blood dude.
I have a funny feeling i know what it is but i hope im wrong, cos ive seen what happens to people if it goes down that road.
So the waiting begins, and im not a good person for waiting. I will let you know if i here anything, till then have a good weekend :)
Offski

Tubby the Tuba

For 14 years of my 38 years i played in brass bands.
I started at the age of 11, it was my first day of high school, and every year you had the out of school clubs come to your class and give you the speech of why you should join them. I didn't really listen to what they had to say, but at dinner time i heard this amazing sound coming from the music room and went to find out more. I managed to sneak past the dinner ladies and get to the music room, and there i stood watching and listening through the door. In front of a group of 28 people with brass instruments stood Miss Bailey, she knew i was there but never said anything till the end of practice. She came over to where i was standing and said 'hello' with a huge smile, 'what do you think?, would you like a try?', and that was that i never looked back. Of course me being me, i didnt go for the smallest instrument, i picked up the biggest, a Tuba and it was nearly has big has me and took to it like a duck to water.
It was ideal being in the school band for a couple of reasons : the first was we were allowed into school early (8.30am) because we had to play for the assembly, and second we got into school dinners first and practiced at dinner time. Both of these were brilliant because i got away from the school bullys which plagued my entire school years, and i made some good friends.
Music came easy to me for some reason, and to be honest apart from Golf the only thing that has. after 6 months of playing and taking the huge thing home every weekend, i found out that the man across from mum and dads conducted a local youth band. One afternoon there was a knock at the front door, Dave stood there asking if i wanted to go along with him to Tuesday night practice and maybe have a try out, I agreed and along i went. I walked into the sports hall of Shavington high school to see everyone sat in sections, in a semi circle, Dave introduced me and i sat and listened to the first half of practice. It was a totally different noise to what the school band was producing, it was awesome. The second half i took my place at the back in the Bass section, there was 4 of us, 2 Eb and 2BBb basses. I joined there and then and the next 14 years were a blast, the places i went to, the people i met and the things i saw and got up to.
They will be in my next blog, thanks for reading.
Offski

Wednesday 02/03/2011

Half way through the week, and to be honest not much has happened.
Last night it was the big football match between Chelsea and Man Utd, it was an enjoyable match with lots of ups and downs, but in the end the best team won, and as predicted David Luiz scored in his second game for us. Also Fergie had a moan about some of the referee's decisions, i have noticed he dosent winge when the ref is in there favour, funny that !
Also yesterday i had to got the doctors with what feels like 2 golf balls in my neck and a shoulder pain that is getting too intense to bear. Been to have some blood taken this morning for tests, then have to go back friday morning for the results, i will let you know how i go on.
I have looked at some company websites that are looking for writing jobs and blogging, it proves the work is there (and plenty of it by the way), i just need to pull my finger out of my arse and start bidding for some of them, starting of slowly and building up over sometime. So fingers crossed, i might get my wish and get to stay at home with my princesses.
Just a quick word about the virus that went through Twitter last night like a dose of salts, it only takes one person and everyone else within 10 mins is knackered. I confess that i pressed on the like but didnt go all the way through it, so come out not to bad, and i was on my iphone which helped. Changed my password as soon has and things seemed to settle down, although my account did send some DM's that wasnt me. I apologise if you got one of me, but it wasnt me :)
Right offski
Thanks for reading